Thursday, April 7, 2011

He is Able

Today I feel that He is near. And this is refreshing, because I honestly went through a time frame where I did not.

With my friend being pregnant, it's been sort of a pseudo pregnancy for me, which is FUN. No, really, it is kind of funny! We have synchronized nausea bouts, and I've been ridiculously tired along with her. (Don't worry--I'm really not pregnant.)

Last night while she was going to the emergency room with bleeding--and I didn't hear my phone, so I didn't know--I was having a peculiar dream about my daughter. To back up: When I was a few weeks pregnant with Kate, I experienced what the doctor called a "threatened miscarriage" and called this very friend to come over and watch Keagan while we went to the ER. Obviously, Kate turned out perfect and is my spunky three year old now. Well, I was dreaming that something happened to her and she was all of a sudden mentally retarded. I don't know what caused it, but the doctors were telling me that she would be this way forever and there was nothing that could be done. I wouldn't believe them, and I kept praying against this in my dream. It does get a bit muddy toward the end, but I remember that she turned out fine.

Just like when I was pregnant with her.

The dream was so thick, so real and hanging over me when I woke up this morning. In just a few minutes, I heard my phone and checked it, finding my friend's message from 3 am. I know this may sound insane, but I feel like me praying in my dream was me praying for my friend when she needed it but couldn't reach me. And the message of hope that I'm so aware of today is that He took care of my Kate when I wasn't sure if He would.

I've always known that He could; I just didn't know if He would.

My friend was released this morning with the same diagnosis: "threatened miscarriage" that I received with Kate. I truly know how her mind is still reeling, how her heart stopped in those moments. I know the flood of relief she certainly felt when she saw the tiny fluttering heart on the ultrasound monitor. And I know the desperation in the pleas to our Father.

That God has allowed me to experience so much of this pregnancy with her so far is amazing. (And it's only fitting that "Our God is an Awesome God" is playing via Pandora on my television right now.) I love seeing evidences of God, especially in ways that are not easily explained away. Like I said, I may sound crazy, but I feel like I have a new understanding of when scripture talks about the Spirit interceding for us when we cannot.

He is able. Will you pray with me that He will bring protection, health, rest, peace, assurance, wholeness?
Peace of Christ to you,

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