Wednesday, June 24, 2009

The Point Of It All

Some aspects of our life (as a family) have been difficult recently; it's been tough to find joy each day. We had become whiny and dissatisfied in general. WHY? Because, as a dear friend and mentor helped me see, we were worshiping the wrong thing(s). We were not truly worshiping God, but a lifestyle instead. It's unbelievable how much God loves us and has our days set up so that He may teach us His Word.

Yesterday morning, the threading of my emotional suitcase came undone...and my crap fell out. Days of the same disheartening, daunting, depressing rituals piled on top of each other and spilled over entirely. There was no room for even one more ounce of weight. It literally poured out of me. After some serious spiritual house cleaning, He slowly poured Himself back into me all day. I felt (and am still feeling) the gaps closing in and filling up with more of His purpose and thoughts. During nap time, I dug into chapter 3 of John Piper's book "Don't Waste Your Life" and couldn't hold back the emotional downpour that accompanied his words.

Very softly and gently (because He loves me enough to tell me with love), I could hear Jesus asking me where I find my joy. On what is it based? When I wake each morning, what do I expect will fulfill me? The answers I had to honestly give grieve me deeply.

"...if you could just have a good job with a good wife, or husband, and a couple of good kids and a nice car and long weekends and a few good friends, a fun retirement, and a quick and easy death, and no hell--if you could have all that (even without God)--you would be satisfied. That is a tragedy in the making. A wasted life" (Piper, "Don't Waste Your Life" 45).

This, even though I wouldn't dare admit it, was where my heart was buried. I have been wanting security. I have been wanting a perfect schedule. I have been wanting "happiness."

Steven Furtick of Elevation Church gave me an image of how God's plans blow ours off the map completely:

When I am thinking "Happiness," God is thinking "Joy."

When my idea for what will fix me is _______, God is thinking of something SO much greater. Fill in the blank with whatever you are desiring. God's plan is so much bigger than we can even imagine. And I'm glad, aren't you? Because every time I plan it out, it crumbles. But Jesus' plan will never crumble. Because with His plan, He is glorified completely.

The point of this life is nothing more than to glorify Him.
That's it.

So, if our sole purpose is to glorify Him in all we do, then worry can't be part of the deal. If God has this specific passionate purpose in mind for us and is great enough to carry it out in us, isn't He also strong and mighty enough to carry us through it and take care of the details (such as keeping us alive, for example)?

I was reminded of this last week when my family and I were at the mall. We were about to leave, but we wanted to let the kids play in the kids' area first. Suddenly, an enormous BANG exploded behind us in the food court. In those mini-seconds, my mind attempted to interpret what the noise was: a bomb, a gun? (Yes, it was that loud.) We saw people running away from a trash can that had smoke billowing out of it. Something had exploded in that trash can.

The possibilities of what could have happened that evening made me sick. I was staring in the face how little we are in control of...anything, and how much we have to rely on God for our every breath. Every breath. The one you just took. Will there be another? And did that last one glorify the One who gave it to you?

Our anthem for this week is:

Joy is not circumstantial. Joy is found in pointing our hearts to Christ.

Peace of Christ to you,